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Monday, 11 May 2015

A note to my daughter to say...Thank you

I haven't written to you in a while.  As a result my heart is full.

Dear Tumi

My sweet angel, Thank you. You are to me, a second chance to experience life that is untainted and devoid of cynicism.  You colour my dreams with colours so beautiful,  it is like they contain the very breath of God. You are the ecstasy of a dream realised.

Thank you for reminding me to not take life so seriously,  for reminding me to take a moment to notice a pretty butterfly that lands on a petal in our backyard.

I relish the times I get to drive around running errands with you in the back seat, pointing out everything of interest that we drive past. And even though you make me play the same song over and over,  I actually love it because nothing gives me more joy than hearing you mispronounce all the words as you sing at the top of your voice, and out of tune. You always have a smile on your face as you sing. This shows that you are not afraid to be judged.  You my child, are brave,  smart, curious and you don't even know it.

You infect every space you inhabit with your innocent optimism.
I don't always feel worthy to be your Mom, but I am always grateful. Thank you for always reminding me that at some point I understood unconditional love...and your job has been to remind me to believe in it again.  Thank you.  I ♡ you, my Tumi.

Tuesday, 5 May 2015

A post to my crush

I have stalked you for so long. Every time I caught a glimpse of your beguiling good looks, with eyes that seemed to sparkle non stop. You captured my imagination,  and no matter how hard I tried I couldn't  shake your assault to my senses. I remember plunging through magazines as a young girl,  hungrily pouring over your images, too scared to tear them out, lest I diminish you in my eyes.

I was weary of obsessing about you or of the day we would finally meet.  My palms get clammy just thinking about all the diary posts I dedicated to you. " Oh how do I love thee, let me count the ways" that's how they'd always start.

I wonder is it your power that most intrigues me? Or is it your raw sexiness?  Perhaps it is your confident boldness,  pulsating from your every pore. I've heard people talk about you, but I can hear they don't see you the way I do. They count you in long bucket lists, like you are merely something one needs to do. I always knew our meeting would change my life, our eyes would lock, my knees would wobble, and my heart would trumpet an anthem that Alicia Keys made famous about a city we both love, it goes  " New York,  concrete jungle where dreams are made of,  there's nothing you can't do, now you're in New York,  New York,  New York! "

Anyone who has ever been to New York knows that it is impossible not to be spellbound by its energy,  you can't ignore the way it assasinates your every sense with its lights, smog coming from underground and  it's exuberant hustle and bustle, that knows no end.

I met my crush, we've seen each other twice.  I've fallen hard. My crush is now my love. Oh New York!